Some time back I went to a wedding with my friends. We saw a gay man there. Honestly, I don’t even know if he was one. We just perceived him to be gay because of the feminine touch in his behaviour. That was all we needed to judge him inside out. He was ignorant of our glares, or perhaps, he had accustomed himself to the looks of the people. He was out there, having the time of his life, he was partying, singing, dancing and he didn’t give a f*** about the world. And then there were we, “the people”. We couldn’t get our eyes off him. We kept staring at him, shocked by the way he danced and moved his body. We cracked jokes on him and found a reason to pass the evening. Something that day made me a little uncomfortable, but I chose to ignore that feeling.
After a few days, I went to a parlour with another set of friends. There was another gay man there. And similar to the previous occasion even this time we couldn’t stop smiling. We were so conscious in his company, trying to hide our expressions, we just kept waiting for him to go away. The strange uncomfortable feeling that I felt on the wedding day came back to me again. Only this time I knew what it was and what caused it. I realised the difference between fighting for a community and respecting it.When we respect someone it means that we have accepted them for the way they are. They don’t make us conscious, they don’t make us laugh in a wrong way. We are comfortable in their presence. And when it comes to the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgenders) community, I personally think that we have a long way to go.
We fight for them, colour our DPs rainbow to show our support, write statuses against section 377. We claim that we are modern enough, but the truth is that we still aren’t. We pretend to help them chase love but we deprive them to be themselves.
I was watching “Chak De! India” the other day. In the movie Shah Rukh Khan says, “Humari hockey me Chakke Nahi hote” (There are no sixes in hockey). I think we all know what it really meant, and for those who don’t. It meant that Eunuchs can’t play hockey. This dialogue is still shown in that movie. There is no beep sound to cover it. These statements are worse than any curse word that exist in our dictionaries.
India for me will become modern when it grows up enough to accept a community and fight for its respect and not just for its rights.
Also, censor board should do something about the petty statements made against LGBTs in movies.
Signing off with a hope that someday we will change for good.